Wk3/Day 20- Emotional Eating

I have been reading a brilliant book called "Eating the Moment" by Dr. Pavel Somov a practicing psychologist in the area of mindful eating.  In one of the chapters I read last night he discusses emotional eating.

He gave me some "food for thought" on reasons we eat to make ourselves feel better.  He explains that from birth, our parents first go-to for an upset baby is to feed it.  Many cultures, including our own, show love by providing food and treats.  In fact, our family dinner time is centered around the reality that eating, as we discuss the ups and downs of our day, is food for the soul.

He goes on to explain that instead of trying to change the fact that we go to food for comfort, we should instead make sure that our choice in coping truly helps.  Here are some of his ideas.

1. We should make a conscious choice to turn to food to cope with stress or emotion.  Not just veg out in front of the TV with a bag of potato chips, but verbally proclaim 'I feel             , I choose to eat            ,  to make me feel           .'

2. We should take the time to determine what our actual comfort foods are, instead of wasting calories on foods that don't really hit the spot.  Find the food that heals you and stock up on it.  You shouldn't make it a forbidden food, because then your emotional eating is full of guilt and doesn't really heal you.  Instead stock up and put it in a special place, then label it "medicine" as it is medicine for the soul.


3. Then carry around a little post- it pad and write yourself a prescription for some soul medicine.  This gives you at least a point to stop in a check whether the food is helping or not.  Write down "1 cup of ice cream" or "3 cookies".   Then at least stop and emotionally check whether that was enough or even the right prescription.  You can write another prescription if needed.

The point is to be mindful of what your doing, why your doing it, and whether or not it's helping.  Don't just mindlessly eat . . . let the food you choose really feed your soul.

Wk 3/Day 18- All You Can Eat Buffet

Last night we went out to eat at an all you can eat buffet.   I was way excited because I was mostly thinking about an expansive salad bar that most likely would serve lite-ranch.  I tell you, there is nothing better than a salad with all the fixings.  I was certain that this was a good idea, because with all the options available, I knew I would find plenty to eat that fit my diet rules.

When we got there, I was hungry and ready to find something yummy to eat.  As I wandered around with my empty plate, I couldn't help but notice all of the things I couldn't have.  Scones- NO.  Pizza- NO.  German chocolate cake- Naughty! 

My husband found me staring at the plate of cookies marked "sugar free".  At this moment, as I contently sit at my computer, I can't believe I was even considering bothering to eat a cookie that was sugar free.  But in that moment of deprivation it sounded pretty good.  Of course made with white flour and regular chocolate chips, I still would lose points- and a sugar free cookie is not worth that, so I passed it up.   

I went back to pile up the salad that I had so looked forward to.    Oh, it was grand!  Combination Romaine lettuce and spinach, with corn, carrots, cucumbers, cauliflower, kidney beans, raisins, sesame seeds (probably oil roasted- oops), topped with low fat cottage cheese and lite-ranch. 

After satisfying my hunger a little with a heavenly salad, I felt much better and could emotionally handle going back to the buffet for some roast, potatoes, and carrots, and some yummy squash.  I will admit, I got a piece of German chocolate cake and ate the coconut topping off with a little bit of cake for my last free 150 calorie indulgence for the week.  (Now I have to make it through the weekend without any indulgences- Hummm!)

Am I pathetic?  Or is this real?  The first week of this diet I felt empowered by it, but as it's wearing on I feel so limited by it.  I seem to remember a comment on one of my first posts indicating that as the diet wore on the feelings of deprivation grew stronger, so perhaps I am not pathetic- this is the path of everyone on a diet.  What do you think?  (Feel free to tell me I am pathetic- It's true)

Wk3/Day 16- My Secret

One of my biggest fears of this diet is that my children will find out what I am doing.  I am desperate to keep it secret from them.  Why?  Because I know the emotional detriments of dieting, and I never want my children to believe it is the way of life.

I teach my children that we can make good food choices, to take care of our bodies and make them strong.  I speak to them of the joy of our bodies and the amazing things they can do.   I find opportunities to show them the feeling of accomplishment in doing something physically challenging (like hiking to a scenic lookout).

I want them to have joy in and appreciation for their bodies and never to believe they must change them in order to be happy.  I want them to incorporate healthy eating and 'activities of living' in their lives- because that's just how we've always done things (not because "Mom's on a health kick again").


It was so hard last week when they wanted to share their treats with me.  My 3 year old is so kind  and couldn't understand why mommy was saying she didn't want any of his candy.  He knew it tasted good, knew I would find pleasure in it and therefore wanted to share.  And actually I felt like I was lying, in telling him I didn't want any of his candy.  I did want some, but I wasn't about to try to explain why I "couldn't" have any.  I don't want him to believe there are rules of eating that you have to live by when you are a certain weight or age. 

My question to the universe and to all of you, what are the true rules of eating?  I believe they are more limited in number than diet books lead us to believe and that they are unchanging- regardless of age and life situation.  What are they?  I genuinely invite your comments.

Here are my initial thoughts:

• We are meant to derive pleasure from eating and moving our bodies.
•  If we want to enjoy life to its fullest, we must be mindful of what we feed our bodies and how we treat them. 

 

Wk 3/Day 15- Nothing kills a party like . . .

Nothing kills a party like a person in the dinner group drilling the waitress on whether they can receive a discount on the meal if they forgo the dinner roll, which salad dressings are free from added fat/sugar, and whether they can have the cheese picked out of the Caesar salad.

This last week was absolutely no simple sugars week- an optional challenge which I chose to take on.  Unfortunately, this weekend, it also coincided with several family events.  I expected it to be difficult to say no to the  delicious treats and restaurant options, but was surprised that my resolve to meet the challenge this week made it easy to choose.  However, I didn't expect the emotional ride that would follow as I became the odd man out.

I lamely brought my own food into the restaurant to supplement the only dish I could find on the menu that fit the rules, soup.  I called my mom before family dinner and asked her to pick the cheese off a section of enchilada for me, before she baked it.  I quietly ate my non-sugared peaches, while the rest of the family ate birthday brownies.  It sucked!  

I am pleased to say I made it through the week and enjoyed peanut butter on my toast immediately after weighing in this morning.  Although I was strong all week against the temptation to eat anything containing sugar, I found pleasure in secretly planning what I was going to eat this week to "make up for it".

In fact, the deprivation was so overwhelming on Saturday, I made my husband take me to Subway for a sandwich all for me.  First, we responsibly researched online to determine sugar and white flour content of the different breads.  When we got there I ordered a foot long sandwich, with ham and provolone cheese and tons of veggies.  I had planned to take off the cheese and give it to my husband, but in the moment I unwrapped it, I just couldn't bear to give up the cheese.  I ate the whole foot long sandwich within about 7 minutes and, for the first time last week, felt satisfied.
P.S. I did have to subtract weekly points for eating the cheese.

My conclusion:  It was empowering to know I am stronger than my cravings, but my real conclusion is healthy eating is not restrictive dieting. 

And now, off to enjoy the brownie I swiped from the party last night. 

Wk 2/Day 12- Deep Fried Nuts- Are you kidding me?

 I was super busy yesterday working on web design for a secret project I will reveal sometime in the next few weeks.  Did you miss me?  Probably not, huh!

Thought I'd share a bit of new found knowledge with everyone in the way of a public service announcement.

We went grocery shopping at this wonderful store that has an enormous bulk bin section.  They have ALL SORTS of candy, but also different grains, beans, pastas, flours, nuts, etc.  I wanted to get some nuts for a snack since they aren't on the naughty list.  Debating between some smokey roasted almonds and just salted ones- I asked my husband which sounded better to him.

Him- "You can have nuts on this diet?"
Me- "Well of course.  They are just nuts."
Him- "But Honey, they are oil roasted."
Me- "Oil's not on the bad list- just butter and sour cream and other yummy things like that."
Him- "Do you know they are deep-fried in the oil?"

WHAT?!?

 

Later when we got home he asked me what I thought he meant when he said they were oil roasted.  Well, I thought he meant what any other human might have thought- lightly spritzed in oil and baked.  They are NUTS for goodness sake!

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that our food industry deep-fries nuts to give them a crunchy texture.  Much more efficient then tray loads of nuts in the oven.  I recognize that a nut isn't going to absorb the same amount of oil as say, a Twinkie in a vat of hot oil.  But here for the public service announcement . . . Unless nuts specify "dry roasted", they are not what you think they are!

Did you already know this?  

There is a good ending to the story.  My personal chef/husband bought me some raw almonds, took them home, and oven roasted them for me.

Wk2/Day 10- What did I just eat?

Time for me to again share my weakness.  It's the unconscious eating!  Since the bonus challenge this week is absolutely no added sugar, I have to really pay attention to what I eat.  I have never realized how often I just toss something into my mouth without a second thought.  This week it's actually causing me anxiety.  The other night I popped something in my mouth and just about had a panic attack . . . "What did I just eat?  Did it ruin everything?  Oh, thank goodness it was just a piece of chicken!  How did I get chicken in my mouth?"  Oh dear!

Our host for the fitness program, promised us that fruit would never taste so delicious as it will this week because it's essentially the only sweet thing to eat.  Boy is she right!  We get points for 3 fruit servings a day and I am certainly eating more like 4-5.  As a dietitian, I always tried to convince others that fruit could be their dessert instead of other higher calorie choices, although I was never really convinced myself.  But on day 3 of no simple sugars whatsoever, I tell you: nothing like sweet cool grapes to satisfy a sweet tooth- nothing like it!

Wk2/Day 9- Activities of Living

Perhaps this is a pathetic way to get my exercise points, but as a busy mom, I have found it's my only practical way.  Most days I just can't find 45 minutes of uninterrupted time to do a 'workout'.  Even when I try to pop in my favorite Zumba DVD, I end up dancing around with a toddler on my hip (probably should get extra exercise points for that). 

So here's how I've been getting most of my points- walking everywhere.  Walking everyone to school to drop off the oldest, then walking downtown to the library, then home, then back to the school to pick up and then back home.  It works quite well for us, because usually 1 or 2 boys are on bikes/scooters, so I have to huff it to keep up. 

I think the world needs to focus more on activities of living, instead of the dreaded exercise, to be healthy.  In fact, the Fit in 6 program I am doing just gives points for time spent being active.  We as a group even decided playing red light/green light with a bunch of kids definitely counts for exercise points. 

Here's some other fun ideas for activities of living that I came across recently.  They come from the Intermountain Healthcare's Weigh to Health Program.

• Take the stairs instead of the elevator
• Walk whenever you can, instead of driving
• Get off the bus/train a stop early - or park farther away and walk
• Stand up while talking on the phone.  And if you have a cordless or cell phone- walk while you talk
• Lose your TV remote control- Get up to change the channels
• At work, use lunch hours and coffee breaks to take a walk around the building
• Use the restroom on a different floor at work and home
• Make social occasions more active- instead of dining out, go dancing, bowling, or hiking
• Schedule walks before or after dinner.  Take the whole family
• Turn weekends into activity days.  Go hiking, biking, or golfing- and bring a healthy picnic along
• Create a "walking carpool."  Take turns walking your kids- and your neighbor's kids- to and from school
• Get a dog and walk it twice a day (this one makes me laugh)